Many years ago, I wrote an essay entitled The Meaning of Life, a consequence, I suppose, of being not so much
a paid-up ponderer on such things - like a professional philosopher or a
theologian - as being merely a thinking animal whose mind had been encroached
upon by a rather cerebral matter. Without realising it, I engaged in abstruse reasoning in the piece. Since I could not - human that I was -
truly define the meaning or purpose of life, I had merely skirted the
boundaries of being and beingness (and, of course, those of nothing and
nothingness) in the short piece. The essay was published in a newspaper I wrote
for in West Africa. Much of the feedback I got harped on the essay’s indecipherability; in other words, the promise the title gave was not met by the contents; if I had proffered any meaning of life at all, it was lost in the complexity of the essay.
I was slightly surprised by this observation because I was
under the impression that my ‘take’ on the meaning of life was clear and
accessible. In so much as I would like to be seen as an essayist who had
expressed his views as lucidly as he could, the imputation of intellectual
esotericism and verbal denseness was not quite something to whoop about – although
these days, I don’t give two hoots about how what I write comes across to
anyone. Even then, how does one begin to write about the metaphysics of the meaning of life without running the risk of stylistic heavy-handedness or even piffling
meaninglessness? One must necessarily walk a tightrope and be careful lest one fall into a dark intellectual abyss.
But then, shouldn’t every essay or book entitled The Meaning of Life be approached with
common sense, with the preknowledge that however eloquent and reader-friendly
the author may be, she is never going to offer any substantive explanation of
the meaning of life, even if the writing style is as clear as the retina of
Gautama Buddha’s eye, the value will be opaque, at the very best. No Guru, no
Teacher, no Polymath has been able to hazard a definitive and provable
interpretation of the essence of life. No book either - not the Bible, Quran, or Vedas; neither Aristotle’s nor Spinoza’s Ethics, nor Collected
Shakespeare or Shaw or Soyinka can offer anyone a conclusive explanation of all
things. Of course, Christians might find a sort of meaning in the Bible, and
Muslims might see the Quran as the book
that sheds gnostic light on the shadowiness of being, but a neutral-minded
reader of both books would only encounter bemusement, some poetry, contradictions,
myths, antediluvian tales, reductio ad absurdum, cautionary bugaboos in the
shape of hell and eternal roasting and a temperamental inadequate ‘creator’ and
‘controller’ of the world – and possibly wafts of self-induced spiritualism.
The question of the
meaning of life came up again a few weeks ago (years now; this article was written
a few years ago) when I ran into Professor Terry Eagleton’s book of the same
title. Eagleton is a literary critic, not a philosopher, and maybe that is why
his short introduction to this nagging, if pointless, question is not one of the
most original. He goes over the same old grounds. Without explicitly declaring
himself religious, hews the line of believers over against ‘unbelievers’ - he
is, by the way, the arch-Anti-Dawkins. Although the book is fairly readable, Eagleton
offers no meaning for life, and he actually warns against frequent posing of the
question. He rounds on philosophers he considers nihilists, such as the
profoundly pessimistic Schopenhauer. He touches on how modernism and its
mongrel offspring, postmodernism, have been detrimental to the grand narrative of
meaning. Enough of Eagleton now – he committed blasphemy with his reproof of Schopenhauer!
Viktor E Frankl’s Man’s Search For Meaning, the author’s quest for
meaning against the background of his experiences as a Holocaust survivor, makes
for better reading.
Have I just had a
brainwave of what the meaning of life might consist in? You bet - not. Isn’t this
a triangulation we had better leave to the three Fates to deal with, particularly
Atropos, who would inevitably cut off the thread spun by Clotho and measured by
Lachesis? Does religion offer any meaning as ‘believers’ would like to imagine?
Well, even when I was a kind of believer, the galleon that carries Minotaur
of Meaning in its underdeck was very far from the offing. Even the finest
explainer or interpreter of the Bible or Quran could not crystallise
their readings into an epiphany of unassailable truth or summa. Like many
things in life, religion offers some consolation and acts as a placebo, a potent
narcosis, which may truly help some to cope with humans’ common Oedipean blindness.
Rather than being the polar light, religion is no more than a bendable cane -
a ‘walking stick’ - with which some try to feel their way through the vast dark
jumble-room, or even charnel house, of life.
Philosophy gives its own consolations, too, although less pompously
than religion. As a matter of fact, philosophy offers no consolations – despite the flavoursome proffering of such by writers/philosophers from Boethius to
Alain de Botton – what it does is to turn anyone who embraces it (or her,
Boethius’s Lady Philosophy) into the ballast in the very boat of his/her life -
you sink or float by your own devices. Philosophy does not attempt the concentring
of life’s rather spiky spokes onto any hub – in other words, philosophy is only
a cog and not the hub. Philosophy
does not offer saccharine julep that kills the bitter taste of life. Philosophy
offers counterpoison; it offers hemlock, which destroys the candied sweetness and light in your mouth and guts, which will not kill you and will not
make you stronger, but probably savvier. Philosophy removes your milk teeth and
especial sweet tooth and replaces them with nicotine-coloured wisdom
teeth. Backgrounding any philosophical study of life’s meaning is the Socratic
axiom that he knew nothing. Socrates would not have been able to offer any definitive
meaning of life if you asked him. At best, he would ask you to tell him what
meaning you thought life, or your life, had - loading the question so lightly
that you would certainly be shown up.
So how does one get a purchase on the meaning of life? One
might as well shin up a slippery Babel-tall thread to Christian heaven to
arrive at it. So far as I am concerned, there is no definable meaning at all to
life; it only behoves every person to seek and define the meaning of his or
her life (a very anti-Eagleton subjectivism). I see nihility in many things
we give undue weight to, but I am not a nihilist in the sense of being
completely enamoured of nothing and nothingness. I have a family and kin; I have
friends. Even if I fancy myself a great understander of nihilism, I am a poor
nihilist just like I failed to be a true antinatalist (a practiser of the Silenian
ideal of better-never-to-have-been-born). I only try to give meaning to things within
reason. For instance, I reject the possibility or existence of any god because even
if there is any conclusive evidence of a ‘god’ being there, it will add zilch
meaning to my own existence – as a matter of fact, the thought of any entity
called ‘god,’ or worse, ‘God,’ detracts from any meaning I may want to give to life.
In a way, the monotheist God reminds me of the story of Diogenes the Cynic and
Alexander the Great, God being the latter: a distraction, a kibitzer who
interferes in the treacherous card game of life – except, of course, that Alexander
the Great was real and God is a figment of our imagination. Before the Distinguished
Thing - the name Henry James gave to death - arrives to do the
not-so-distinguished thing, humans do their best to shamble and blunder,
Oedipus-like, for any kind of meaning for their lives. We quest for meaning in
religion. In spiritualism. In food. In various forms of antifoodism. In
friendship. In freemasonry and kindred organisations. In family. In love. In
books. In art. In music. In bullshit and bullshitting. In drugs. In gambling
and every kind of addiction, including the Internet. In
procreation. In philoprogenitiveness. In childlessness. In many ruts and rituals of everyday life. In masturbation. In sex
and its manifold kinks. Oh yes, in sex. Or why would the late English poet
laureate, John Betjeman, say in his last days that the only regret he had was
that he did not have enough sex? And the latest pop-psych weasel word, ‘sex
addiction,’ is indeed nonsense. In my opinion, consenting adults can have as much
sex as they can. Now, the once ragingly goatish Bill Clinton seems to have ‘mortified
the flesh’ and zenned out, but in a rampant Freudian alter-world, the ageing man
would not say 'no' if he were gifted an Abishag to warm the cockles of his heart –
or some other cockled organ. However, whether these things offer any ‘real’
meaning is another matter. Again, take the primal sop we offer ourselves: sex.
For good reasons, the French describe the act’s orgasmic finale as ‘la petite
mort’ or ‘the little death,’ but then for many who recover from ‘the little
death,’ post-coital tristesse, or after-sex sadness, melancholy, sometimes overtakes
the momentary spasms of ecstasy.
I like reading books, and I have immensely enjoyed reading some of them, even experiencing Barthes’ version of ‘le petit mort’ while perusing certain books, for instance, Tolstoy’s War and Peace. But what is the
sum of meaning that I have found in the sum of every book that I have read? It
is incalculable, and this is not because I have found in them a googol (or
google?) of meaning that has led me to resolve and ratiocinate the surds of
life, but incalculable because even now I cannot begin to unravel how the
reading of George Eliot’s magnificent Middlemarch has contributed to the sum of
my intellect. Or Kant’s Critique of Pure Reason – or Critique of Practical
Reason, or even his Critique of Judgement. Or Achebe’s Arrow of God. Or American
Psycho. When you throw the latter novel into the mix and yet another offbeat
beast like Thomas Pynchon’s Gravity’s Rainbow, in which a character gets his
kick from eating shit, then I think it becomes clear that one tittle of meaning
you take from life is the bilge in its underbelly, the utter shittiness
(notwithstanding that the books are fiction, I would imagine that murderous
psychopathy and pathological coprophilia are humanly probable). This is what
depth psychology tries to help us to crystallise, sometimes with goodish results. Even though I am a keen reader of Freud,
Freudianism and its offshoots, Jungian psychology is my guilty pleasure, guilt
because, even with the best will in the world, I can’t embrace Jung’s
God/paranormal placebo...
Now, why stop abruptly? Or isn’t that how the
lives of many of us are cut off, suddenly, unwarned, even painfully. To
conclude, I will quote Flaubert. ‘Stupidity consists in wanting to reach
conclusions. We are a thread and want to know the whole design.’ We simply
can’t.